Find Peace (and Maybe a Little Joy) During the Holidays

The holidays are marketed as “the most wonderful time of the year,” but let’s be honest — sometimes it feels more like “the most overwhelming time of the year.” Between travel, finances, family dynamics and the pressure to “hold it all together,” this season can take a toll on mental health.

At HearHear Counseling, we want to remind you that it’s completely normal to experience stress, sadness, or even dread during the holidays. You’re not a curmudgeon, you’re human.

Let’s talk about why this season can be tough — and how to take care of yourself through it.

Lower the Bar from “Perfect” to “Good Enough”

If your holiday expectations include matching pajamas, a flawless meal, and zero family tension…you could be setting yourself up for a Hallmark movie, not real life.

Give yourself permission to do less. Burned turkey, a messy home, and awkward small talk are all part of the experience. Focus on connection, not perfection.

TRY THIS: Before each event or task, ask yourself, “What actually matters to me here?” Then do that and skip the rest.

Acknowledge Mixed Emotions

The holidays often stir up complicated feelings of nostalgia, grief, or loneliness (even amid the laughter). It’s okay if your emotions don’t match the festive music or environment in the background.

TRY THIS: Make space for what you feel. Journal, talk to a counselor, or simply take a few quiet moments to breathe. Sometimes, the best gift you can give yourself is permission to not be okay for a bit.

Hear from Our Partnering Therapists

At HearHear Counseling, we often talk with clients about how to stay grounded during this time of year. Two of our partnering therapists shared their reflections and practical wisdom:

Lauren Hall, Partnering Therapist

“The busyness and expectations of the holiday season can easily turn into pressure, overwhelm, and disconnection with self. Too often we get swept up in the demands and hectic pace and end up compromising our own presence and well-being. What if this year, you intentionally did things differently? Implement something each week to help yourself stay grounded: moments that offer a pause in the frantic energy of the season and invite you to engage meaningfully. This could be low-key gatherings with those closest to you or protected time alone where you focus on connecting with yourself. Whatever it looks like for you, I encourage you to prioritize yourself so you can fully experience the peace and magic of the season.”

Lauren’s advice reminds us that peace isn’t found in doing everything, it’s in slowing down enough to actually feel what’s happening.

Emily Bretl, Partnering Therapist

“I love to romanticize my holidays as best I can, but also work to protect my peace and recognize that it’s okay to say NO to plans. I think that’s my biggest self-care strategy for myself. I love to develop my own traditions with my friends or partner around the holidays, too, to ensure I have things to look forward to in the ‘bleak’ feelings of what the holiday season could be.”

Emily’s take is a great reminder that saying no is not negative, it’s a way of saying yes to your well-being. And honestly, developing your own cozy, meaningful traditions beats fighting for mall parking any day.

Keep the Basics…Basic

When stress piles up, our fundamental needs often get neglected. Sleep, hydration, and regular meals aren’t luxuries…they are survival tools.

Check in with yourself about your stress levels and how you are doing at attending to the basic needs you have.

TRY THIS: Keep water nearby, set a bedtime alarm (not just a morning one), and schedule small breaks between gatherings to reset.

Find Small Joys That Are Yours

Maybe it’s watching your favorite holiday movie in pajamas, taking a quiet walk after dinner, or listening to music that soothes you. Joy doesn’t have to be big or loud — sometimes it’s found in the calm moments we create ourselves.

Try this: Ask yourself, “What makes me feel grounded?” and build it into your week — even just 10 minutes can make a difference.

You Don’t Have to “Do the Holidays Right”

There’s no universal scorecard for the holidays. Try to stay present, take care of yourself, and extend yourself a little grace when you can.

And if things get tough, remember that help is available. The counselors at HearHear Counseling are here to listen, support, and help you navigate both the stress and the sweetness of the season.

Warmly,
The HearHear Counseling Team

(Because everyone deserves to be heard — especially during the holidays.)